Hack-O-Lantern
When it comes to horror movies from the 80s “Satanic panic” era, Hack-O-Lantern’s got it all.
Hack-O-Lantern’s got promiscuous teens. Hack-O-Lantern’s got a hair metal band with dry ice and lasers. Hack-O-Lantern even has actual Satanists, including a Satanic grandpa who lectures his progeny about not being into Satan enough, saying folksy stuff like, “You’re enough to try the patience of Satan!” The one thing Hack-O-Lantern doesn’t have is an evil jack-o-lantern, or even an evil pumpkin, or any clear reason to be called Hack-O-Lantern at all. Still, catchy title!
The movie centers on a deeply creepy family, living on a farm in California with a spectacular view none of them seem to appreciate. There’s the troubled teenage son (or grandson? or a little bit of both?) of the local neighborhood Satanic cult leader. There’s his exhausted mother, who gives the mom from Carrie a run for her money. There’s a nice sister, and a nice little brother who’s a sheriff’s deputy despite looking twelve years old. Put them all together at the world’s strangest Halloween party - complete with a terrible, impromptu stand-up act - and you’ve got a goofy witch’s brew with no pumpkin flavor whatsoever.
Get your most authentic plastic devil horns and join Mike and Bill for the horrors of Hack-O-Lantern!
Written by: Mike Nelson, Conor Lastowka, and Sean Thomason
Contributing writers: Jason Miller and Zach Shatzer
Something you should know:
Rated TV-MA for violence, language, blood and gore, nudity, and fake severed goat heads.
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