One of the best things about litter used to be its versatility. You could just throw it anywhere! Plus, it encouraged improvisation: If you put your mind to it, anything could be litter! Food scraps, old batteries, syringes, grandpa. Just toss it at the feet of an emotional roadside Indian and be on your way!

But then the hippies had to come along, and everyone got all “groovy” this and “let’s not let the rest of the country end up like New Jersey” that. They started by indoctrinating our children with shorts like The Litter Monster, and the next thing we know our children are spouting propaganda like “Let’s paint garbage cans and put them in the park!” and “Dad, can you help us remove the rusty car parts someone dumped on the baseball diamond?” and “What happened to all those rusty car parts you had in the garage that mom’s been hassling you about getting rid of?”

The short culminates with the construction of the titular Litter Monster, a hulking abomination that begs passersby to shove their litter into its gaping mouth. It’s like a robotic homeless Cookie Monster with severely lowered dietary standards, and to be honest, we really wish there was one on every street corner in our home town.

Join Mike, Kevin, Bill, and thousands of pounds of delicious litter for The Litter Monster!