Top 10 Worst Movies Ever (2013)
The former stars and writers of Mystery Science Theater 3000 know bad movies, and our fans often know more than we do. So when it came to our survey of the Worst Movies of All Time, we had no choice but to defer to their judgment. And now, without further delay, we proudly present to you our Second Annual Top 10 Worst Movies Ever, as voted on by the RiffTrax audience - over 500,000 votes strong!
Click here for Worst Movies #25-11 on this list, and click here for the Worst Movies of 2013.
10. Troll 2 (10,813 votes)
Considered by many to be the low point of the once respected Troll series, Troll 2 has many redeeming qualities. For one you don’t have to have seen the first Troll in order to follow the plot. And second...Um...Hey, look over there! *hurried footsteps, door slams, engine revs, tires screech, plane ticket is purchased, plane takes off, plane lands in Uruguay, bus fare is purchased, bus pulls out of station, bus blows a tire, stranger is hassled until they let me use their cell phone, your phone rings, I ask if you can come get me in Uruguay, I say “Hello?” a couple times until I realize that you hung up on me*
Mike Nelson and Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka travel to Nilbog for our riff of this schlock classic!
Last year's rank: #14
Mike Nelson and Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka travel to Nilbog for our riff of this schlock classic!
Last year's rank: #14
9. X-Men: The Last Stand (12,199 votes)
There is nothing we can say about the badness of X-Men 3 that this picture of fifty-one-year-old Kelsey Grammer in blue fur and a leather vest cannot say one million times better:
But maybe our riff of X-Men: The Last Stand can help.
Last year's rank: #16
But maybe our riff of X-Men: The Last Stand can help.
Last year's rank: #16
8. Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen (14,575 votes)
Early on in Transformers 2, there is a scene where a pair of dogs is shown humping as Shia LaBeouf and his parents shriek at each other. In many movies, this might qualify as a low point. In the Transformers series, this is the equivalent of the Goodfellas Copacabana tracking shot. It’s all downhill from there, as loathsome characters flee incomprehensible SFX mayhem.
The only way the movie could have a redeeming moment is if the Academy uses John Turturro’s “I am directly below the enemy’s scrotum” clip for his eventual “In memoriam” reel.
Get revenge on Revenge of the Fallen with our hilarious commentary track.
Last year's rank: #10
The only way the movie could have a redeeming moment is if the Academy uses John Turturro’s “I am directly below the enemy’s scrotum” clip for his eventual “In memoriam” reel.
Get revenge on Revenge of the Fallen with our hilarious commentary track.
Last year's rank: #10
7. Battlefield Earth (16,687 votes)
The thrilling tale of Johnny “Who’s a” Goodboy Tyler and his exciting quest to blow the dome, Battlefield Earth reaches Operating Thetan Level Crap-lousy. Scientology has definitely pulled its share of unspeakable humanitarian atrocities (It’s true! They’re a horrible, cruel organization founded by a repressed megalomaniac!) but this one may be the worst of all. (It’s really not. They’ve actually done some truly awful stuff that really hurt people.) We think the L. in L. Ron Hubbard must stand for “Leave me out of it if you’re going to see it in the theater” or perhaps “Lunatic who profited off the untold misery of many gullible people.”
There's a riff of this one too. Praise Xenu!
Last year's rank: #7
There's a riff of this one too. Praise Xenu!
Last year's rank: #7
6. Manos: The Hands of Fate (19,910 votes)
Manos has it all: teens making out, luggage fetching scenes, The Master, Torgo... Did The African Queen have a Torgo? We think not! Did Casablanca have teens making out? It did not! Did The Master have a The Master in it? Okay, perhaps you’ve got us there. Manos is still one of the strangest examples of what one person with no particular talent can accomplish when given a camera, a cast, and enough fertilizer to sell so that they’re able to finance the entire thing. We even riffed it in front of a national audience at RiffTrax Live!
Last year's rank: #21
Last year's rank: #21
5. Catwoman (25,366 votes)
Halle Berry back-flipping around in a revealing skintight leather suit, and the internet still hated it. ‘Nuff said.
Last year's rank: #3
Last year's rank: #3
4. Dragonball: Evolution (33,473 votes)
Look, everybody loves Dragonball. And everybody loves Evolution. It was only a matter of time before someone in Hollywood noticed and said hey, we should put these two together... Okay, we didn’t see this movie. But you guys really seem to hate it, and we trust you!
Last year's rank: NOT IN TOP 25
Last year's rank: NOT IN TOP 25
3. Batman and Robin (36,234 votes)
Na na na na, Nipp-les! This movie took the iconic heroes and said to audiences “look over there!” and then, while they were looking, took their money, kicked them in the junk, and ran away.
Get our riff of this top-3 Bad Movie here!
Last year's rank: #2
Get our riff of this top-3 Bad Movie here!
Last year's rank: #2
2. The Last Airbender (37,686 votes)
An adaptation so flat, lifeless, and horrible, fans of the original animated series still wake in a cold sweat every night screaming “SHYAMALAN!” But then, who doesn’t? (We riffed this one, too!)
Last year's rank: #5
Last year's rank: #5
1. Twilight: The Whole Franchise (42,724 votes)
It’s impossible to choose one Twilight movie as the worst because it’s impossible to tell one Twilight movie apart from the next. A bored Hot Topic employee’s daydream stretched across five films, it’s a long slog but at least the series pays off with a big climactic action sequence - sorry, that should say credits sequence, the series pays off with a big credits sequence, letting you know you are finally free to go and struggle to ever find happiness in your life again. (With apologies to Mustache Dad. We love you, Mustache Dad.)
If you haven't seen the Twilight series yet, this pretty much covers it: “Mumble mumble mumble moon eyes. Mumble mumble mumble mumble lie in a field. Mumble mumble mumble perv on a baby. Mumble.”
Congratulations Twilight! You are the Worst Movie of All Time as voted by the RiffTrax audience. Tune in next year for our third annual poll and see if you can continue to be the top movie people love to hate!
We have MST3K-style RiffTrax commentaries for every Twilight movie. Get them here!
Last year's rank: #1
If you haven't seen the Twilight series yet, this pretty much covers it: “Mumble mumble mumble moon eyes. Mumble mumble mumble mumble lie in a field. Mumble mumble mumble perv on a baby. Mumble.”
Congratulations Twilight! You are the Worst Movie of All Time as voted by the RiffTrax audience. Tune in next year for our third annual poll and see if you can continue to be the top movie people love to hate!
We have MST3K-style RiffTrax commentaries for every Twilight movie. Get them here!
Last year's rank: #1
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